I have three children ages 13 years, 8 years, & 3 months. I am a breastfeeding mom. I breast-fed both of my oldest until they were toddlers and I'll probably do the same with my new baby. You would think that I know all that there is to know about breastfeeding, but guess what? I learned something new this time around. Something that actually applied to all three of my children, but that I just realized this time around. What did I learn?

The first six weeks are really hard. You and your baby are actually learning to breastfeed during this time and no one really tells you that. When you leave the hospital it seems the implication is that you are on your way, and that you have all that you need to breastfeed successfully. No one says that you are still learning, and that you may run into serious problems. They give you a book and send you out the door, and each time they have sent me out the door I've been ill-equipped to nurse my baby successfully. With the first one, I left with nipples that were literally busted opened to the white meat. Don't laugh.. it's so not funny. I was in a bunch a pain, filled with questions, and I kept getting answers like, "just keep nursing her." I stayed on the nurse hotline, went to a lactation consultant, and torn through by nursing book looking for answers. Finally my mother came to town and put some aloe and lanolin on my nipples and we air dried them in between feedings. Once they healed and I practiced getting the baby to latch properly it was smooth sailing from there. 

Next came problems with my second baby. She wasn't latching on properly at the hospital, she and I fell asleep for about a four-hour spell without feeding and she ended up jaundice. Before she left the hospital she had to sleep under a ultraviolet light and bottle-feed every hour. They sent her home with the same instruction, so I pumped my milk and fed her soy formula too in the bottle. Her jaundice cleared up, but she was trained to the bottle, not the breast. She had nipple confusion. I was so sad...I cried at night because I didn't think I would be able to nurse my baby. My husband told me to still offer her the breast, and at 3 weeks old she took it. It was all smooth sailing from there. 

Now fast-forward to Oct 2009. I left the hospital with a nursing baby, woo-hoo! Well almost...about a 15 minutes before I got out the door, a Lactation Consultant came in and told me that my baby was behind in weight and was borderline jaundice. Sigh! She and I came up with a plan to nurse him and bottle feed him with a bottle that promotes breastfeeding. I was instructed to see the pediatrician within two days home. The pediatrician said nurse first and bottle-feed after. I had been bottle feeding first and nursing after. We had a bit of a dispute about it, but I followed her instruction. The result-- nipple confusion and a baby who refused the breast. I wasn't daunted because I've been through this before right? Wrong. Week three went by, still pumping and bottle feeding, week four went by, same song and dance, week five came and my husband found a public health print campaign in Canada while surfing around other ads. It gave me hope at about 3 am in the morning while I was pumping milk. It said something like  you don't expect them to learn to ride a bike right away, so why do you think they can learn to breastfeed immediately. It said that the process takes about 6 weeks. 

I talked to other moms who had the same problem,  started doing my research, changed the bottle I was using and at 7 weeks old I finally got my smooth sailing. Whew! Now he's nursing just fine. What's the moral to this story:

1) Breast is best, and we should stay with it until both mom and baby can get it right. It really is an incredible experience.

2) Despite what anybody thinks or says, it's up to mommy and baby to find their rhythm. 

3) It can take time to nurse, and we should get the word out. 

4) Eventually it  can be smooth sailing.

 I am Brooke, mother of three children, 13, 8 & 3 months old. I had my first when I was 27 years old and I truly believed my husband and I were finished having children after our second daughter was born. However, we got a happy surprise last year when we found out we were pregnant with our third child, a young son. 

I'll be chronicling my adventures as a old/new mom here. I homeschool my children, plus my husband and I run our business out of our home. We are had a very busy life before our new baby, and now you get to see how we integrate our new little person into our lives. 

I blog about my homeschool adventures at Homeschool Blast, I blog as the Jewelryrockstar, and I am the editor of Love's Gumbo, an online magazine that empowers women who want to be in and stay in long lasting loving relationships.

I am glad you are here to join in on the fun. Please don't hesitate to comment on my blogging, that's how I know you are there. Plus, I enjoy the dialogue. I want to offer anything that I can, and learn what you have to offer. 

Thanks,

 The Great Rubout

Here we go again! I bring home a baby with lush full hair and after several months I have the amazing balding baby. Around my house we call it rubout. You know what I mean? Bald from ear to ear in the back of the head, but hair on top and at the nape of the neck. So many babies have rubout these days. I guess this is a new phenomenon that has taken place over the past 15 years. It started I think when mom's were encouraged to  put babies "back to sleep" (sleeping on their back). to prevent Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS). The results were great for keeping babies alive, but the shapes of babies heads are flat on the back and their hair gets rubbed out. That's a more than acceptable trade off for the reduced rate of SIDS. 

When my oldest daughter, who is now 13, turned one-year old I trimmed her hair, so that the rubbed out part of her hair was even with the top of her hair. Family and other folks excused her little afro when they thought she could not grow hair, but when they found out that I had trimmed it, boy did I take a lot of flack for that. I got several neck-rolling, eye-rolling, tongue-lashings. I just replied that I thought it was cute and that it looked better than the "rubout." However, in the back of my mind I vowed not to let it happen with the next baby, and it didn't. I wasn't because of anything that I did though. Daughter number #2 has been a rule breaker since birth, so when we put her to sleep on her back and side like good law-abiding parents, she would find a way to sleep on her belly. We worried at first, and then just watched her closely and flowed with it.  As a result, she kept her lush beautiful hair.

When we left the hospital with the baby boy I was told to let him sleep on his belly from time to time, so that his head would be nice and round. They encouraged us to keep an eye on him of course. I let him sleep on his belly in front of me, but he has managed to get rubout anyway. Sleeping on his back and in his car seat has left him with balding sides and back.

I just keep it moist with creme dress, massage the balding spots to promote growth, and joke with the little guy about how I brought him home with a full head of head, and how now he has a half of head of hair. Hehehe, the joys of motherhood.

  I have heard a bunch about the differences between raising boys and girls. It starts from the moment you get the ultrasound announcing the sex if not sooner. The chatter begins, "this one is easier to carry," "that one is easier to raise," "this one loves you more," "that one will leave you,"  "this one will sass you,"  "that one is special."  It's kind of dizzying. The truth is that each child that I have has been easy, hard, lovable, annoying, demanding, special, and loving. I haven't seen any real differences in that respect. However, I have noticed a very interesting difference. 

I noticed it the second day of my new baby's life, the day he was circumcised. When they brought him back to me he was withdrawn, pale and refused to nurse. He stayed that way for about 12 hours. I was very alarmed and saddened. I figured circumcision was painful, but his reaction to it that day was like a jolt of reality in differences. Prior to him, I had only girls so I kind of walked around oblivious to that kind of pain in infants. However, with each diaper change I was reminded of the differences. 

Thankfully, the hospital provided lots of petroleum jelly to use on his area. They sent me home with some too, but the supply lasted only a few days at home. I was reluctant to use a  baby scented jelly I had at home, but it worked great with no irritation. I still use a globs of nursery jelly on his area when he seems irritated by his diaper touching, plus to keep the skin from growing together.  

With the new baby I am not making the same mistakes. I am using the right tools from the start. 

 I've been hearing so much about the new informercial product "Your Baby Can Read." People are going nuts for it and spending lots of money for it. I am not sure if it works in any special ways. It might be fabulous for babies. 

I know something that I've used that is fabulous for babies. My husband and myself reading, singing, and talking to them. Babies love for us to read to them at a very very young age. I started to reading to each of my babies as soon as I brought them home. They love it! They love songs being song to them and they love it when we talk to them.

These three activities are essential to language development and for helping young children when they are ready to read. My two girls started reading around 4 or 5 years old, which I think is young enough. They are avid readers today because I started them reading since birth.

We started a tradition in my house years ago where we wrote a song for the new baby. I started with my first one. I just made up a simple 4 four line song with her name it. I sang to her often. When the next child came along, I asked her to make up  a simple song for her baby sister.  We all sang that simple song to the new baby everyday. They love to hear their name in a song. 

Now with the new baby boy, I asked the baby girl to make up a song with his name in it. It's a great tradition because each child gets to hear their name in a song and they get to write a song as well.

If you don't have the money to buy an expensive language development tool such as ”,Your Baby Can Read,” don't sweat it. Just read to them, sing to them, and talk to them. Plus limit the amount of Television you expose them to in the first few years of life. They will thrive and rise to the top of their class by using these simple tools.

 Through the sweet little smile, the cottony soft hair, the precious little feet, the cutey little boo-boo face heaven on Earth is found in the precious offspring God gave to us. It's so easy to give all I've got to attend to every little need. Nursing, changing, bathing, rocking, reading, singing, sleeping a little bit and starting it all over again the next morning. It's been going on like this for the past 5 months. I have also been weaving in working, blogging, homeschooling, cooking, cleaning, and shopping. At the end of each day I check off the list of "what needs to be done," and over and over again I forget about me. 

I start the day with the resolve of doing something for me, but I end it with feeling satisfied that I've done everything for the little guy and everyone else. Trying to find time for me has become a chore in itself. 

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Baby boy is now 7 months old and not one tooth has popped out of his head yet. He has been cranky, slobbery, feverish, gnawing on everything, but still no teeth. The gums are swollen, but no teeth. It's funny because he has been teething for about the last 3 months. We have all sorts of ice teethers, hard plastic teethers, soft rubber teethers, and he even uses soft terry cloths.  We use a homeopathic baby pill to keep his moods even and happy. It works pretty well.

Not having teeth hasn't slowed him down in the eating department. He eats a bit of table food and little baby cereal bites. He uses his gums to chew. He chews very well without choking. He is changing everyday. 

Today I noticed that he is darker than me. He's going to be a rich caramel color taken from his daddy. When my girls were the age he is now they were still pale white. They are lighter-skinned like me. I can't wait to see how brown his skin gets. We are moving to Florida very soon, so I anticipate spending lots of time on the beach. I am tempted to let him tan in the sun without sunblock, but I know he needs plenty of sunblock made especially for babies. I like to get the waterproof kind because the kids love the water.

This is a time when so many changes are in the air for baby boy. He's pulling up to standing in his baby bathtub, and he's getting up on his knees in preparation for crawling. I've got to get myself ready for mobility because when they start getting around that's when a parent's job gets even harder.

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My baby boy loves, loves, loves his food. He loves it so much that he has to be smothered in it. He has to have it all over his face and body or else he cries. I guess to feel the full experience of the thing he's been dreaming about since he was 6 weeks old he has to be fully immersed in it. Can you imagine? We have to bathe him three times a day. It is getting really old. I have tried putting the bowl right under his chin and shoveling the food in, and that works for a while. However, he gets his hands in the bowl, the food covering begins. He gets food on his eyelashes, his cheeks, his chest, his fingers, and maybe even his feet (if he can reach them). 

In order to keep from bathing him three times a day, I have come with a new feeding method. It's called the two-handed method. I get two spoons out, and a cereal bowl. I put one spoon in his hand and I feed him with the other hand. He drops one spoon in the bowl to reach for the other, and I pick up the dropped spoon to feed him with it. It goes on and on like this until the bowl is empty. If we are lucky, he doesn't cry for more food. If not, then we have to fill the bowl up with more food. Using this method keeps him pretty mess-free. It also keeps us all happy, and him free to eat all the food he wants

Did I mention that he loves everything we put in front of him,well everything except one well-known baby food brand. He loves organic baby food and my home-made veggies. It's a joy to see him love fruits and veggies, but it is a little overwhelming trying to feed a very strong little boy a meal.

Don't believe me click here to see what I mean.

 Baby boy is growing up and is fast developing ways of communicating what he wants and doesn't want. As of late he refuses to sleep in his bed. He used to sleep in his bed just fine all night long, except for when he awoke to nurse. Now he cries loudly if I try to transfer him to his bed and he refuses to go back to sleep. 

We start the bedtime routine off in a good way. Baby eats his dinner, then it is off to his bath, we lotion him down and put him in his night clothes. He may get a song or book depending on how sleepy he is.  Next his gets a night time nursing and then he falls off into a deep sleep. Next comes the hard part. I gently and softly try to transfer him from my arms or my bed into his bed, but then starts the waterworks and loud cries. It's like a faucet. Put him in the crib, the waterworks start. Take him out the faucet shuts off. Goes back and forth like this a few more times until I settle on letting him sleep in my bed with pillows around him and the monitor on. When hubby and I come to bed we sleep with him and keep a careful watch of where he is all night. 

I think he has refused to sleep in his bed because we had to lower his mattress. He weighs about 25 pounds, the way down to his mattress may be a little unsteady when I handle him. The shakiness alerts him to the move, and then he begins the protests. Funny thing is, if I transfer him in the early morning, he has no problem. Plus, he loves when I put him in his crib during the day with lots of toys.

This isn't the first time I've had this problem with a baby. It went like this with my second girl. She went on like this until it was time to buy her toddler bed. Since she climbed out of her crib before she was a year old, we bought her toddler bed at about 11 months old. Hopefully, we will only have to deal with the baby bed woes for just a couple of more months. 

If you have any suggestions, feel free to let us know.

 We've been very focused on keeping baby safe these days. He's mobile and getting around like anything. He crawls a sort of a half crooked crawl, he cruises along the furniture and he's moving about the room getting into everything.  He even stand hands free for a few seconds. He's eight months and this is around the time we as a family have to be super careful about his safety.

 Baby is just 9 months old, but already he is displaying his strong will. There is nothing wrong with having a strong will, but it's up to us parents to cultivate the personalities of our children. When baby grabs the food off of the plates of others we have explain to him that he's not to do it. When he pinches our faces or arms with the pincher grasp from hades, we have to yell out loudly with pain or even fake cry to communicate to him that he is hurting us. When he bites with his new two front teeth we have to say "no biting." 

He's learning, and so the ritual of teaching him how to interact with other humans begins. It will be a long way going, as I am still teaching my 13 year old the ins and outs of social graces. To that point, life is still teaching me the ins and out of social graces as well. It is not the easiest task to teach or learn, but without these lessons our babies will be given an unfair advantage in the world. 

As the years go by he'll learn how to handle toy hammers, how to play with others in the sandbox, how to speak to adults, how to eat properly at the table, and a whole host of other manners. However, we are practicing teaching him how to request to be nursed without tearing off my clothes or biting a chunk out of me. It's slow going.