Whenever I announce that "it's hair day" to my 8 year-old, it feels like we are both getting ready to go to war. I arm myself with detangler, a wide tooth comb, a hair towel, hair moisturizer and ouchless hair bands.  She tenses up, becomes stiff as a board, screams bloody murder and sometimes runs away. 

It's not so much that the process is painful anymore, it's more that she is so used to me struggling to comb through her tender head that she prepares for an ugly process. I am at fault. I'll admit it. When she was younger I used all the wrong tools to do her hair and it resulted in the two of us going to war.

She has soft curly hair, so I thought I could get away with lotion, water, baby oil, and petroleum oil. That's what parents used on my in the 70's, so I thought I could do the same. I failed so often at doing her hair that I started to send her out to get it done. After a while it became too costly because her hair grew longer and thicker. Stylist charge more according to length and thickness. 

I made the decision that I could do it myself, and once I found the right tools I became very successful. I used a wide tooth comb, DETANGLER, hair moisturizer made for dry hair and ouchless bands to prevent breakage. 

I remember one day getting half way through doing her hair without any yelps. I pointed it out to her, and she agreed the detangler was the most helpful. Although, I've had many successful hair days, she has never forgotten the bad ole days, so she still reacts negatively to getting her hair done. I guess it will take a while before she unlearns the negative associations.